Wassup ya’ll. Hope you had a peaceful and prosperous day. I know you left love and wisdom in your wake.
Seems I’m surrounded by relationship conversations everywhere I go. On the phone, in cyberspace, even walking Scamp (my rat dog), folks are talking ‘bout the joys and struggles inherent in growing a marriage. What strikes me is that in all today’s dialog nobody, male or female, used “submit”; Rob Wimberly came close, but tactfully evaded the divisive word. The blanket omission caught my attention because I had to face it in my own marriage recently; now I deal with it daily.
My marriage was in the toilet. I started seriously freelancing again, because I needed cash. I needed cash; I needed a divorce. I made my plan and started working it. I was done with this man, but I couldn’t reconcile done and breaking my vow before God. I did a lot of whining, “please God, fix this situation. Make it so I can keep my promise to you and get away from him.” Guess I don’t have to tell you that didn’t work, huh? One day I got desperate enough to ask, “God, what do I have to do to make this thing right.” Desperate enough to stop sniveling and listen to the answer. The Spirit said only, “Submit.” You know I wasn’t trying to hear that, so I asked again. I know you know I got the same answer. So I look for solace in my Bible and it fall open to Ephesians 5, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” I study, and I wasn’t ready to give in, so I grabbed my Strong’s, still looking for my way out.
The Greek, hupotasso (hoop-ot-as’so) means a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility and carrying a burden. Now ain’t that an accurate picture of how to live in the world? I didn’t get a way out; instead, I got a new perspective. In the turmoil of the day to day, my husband and I had become adversaries. There was no cooperation, voluntary or otherwise, and I’d long since lost any desire to assume any responsibility for his burdens/baggage. I willfully changed my attitude and my marriage is growing again too. I see my husband as wonderful again. I’m excited when he gets home again. The man still has an uncanny ability to pluck my last nerve, but that’s a conversation about forgive. Just saying.
Shout Outs
Vanest Freeman-Smith made a powerful call to prayer. The call is for 8 pm est.; check out her blog now. Rock the Give Principle by Bob Ivory is a smooth coffee and cream challenge to evaluate the investment you’re making in your self.
My friend Moshee Yisrael’s has started a new group. The Writing Life Please show the brother some love and support ya’ll.
My View of the News
The Republican convention is over. Yeah! My two cents…This nomination is a mercy, you know what, for John McCain. He is a great American hero, and like him or not, he has given his career to serving this land. He earned his reward; the GOP is just paying off. I don’t believe anyone seriously believes McCain has a chance of winning election, not after Bush. The presidency is Obama’s to lose. The real danger is the GOP propensity for and expertise in divide and conquer. The next move is to pump as much fear and animosity into American hearts as possible; they will do everything possible to deepen every rift and chasm between us. They will seek to use our differences to incite us to turn on each other, while they groom their great female hope for a coop in 2012.
A Provocative Question
Chris Cager , said, “I want more than a few wives so we can rise a Black Nation!! If it's not about NATIONBUILDING, it's not about anything!!”, in his comment on Rob Wimberly’s BLACK MARRIAGE: A Married Brother's Perspective His statement was ignored, but it got my attention. Personally I’d really like to hear what Chris has to say on the subject; hope he’ll share. He started me thinking; there is no picture of marriage in the New Testament. We know Peter was married and Mary and Joseph were married, but we know nothing of the dynamics of their relationships. There’s plenty description of marriage, but no actual picture. Most of the marriages discussed in the Old Testament were polygamous. Could Chris have a point?
Thank you for reading Just Sayin; I appreciate you taking the time. Please stay a minute more and leave a comment. I’m grateful for the opportunity to share with you and I care what you think. So don’t go before you share.
Well , MIchelle there was quite a burden on your shoulders, and a lot of weight in your heart. We never know what another sister is going through. The Koran speaks of submission for both partners in detail. The Christian Bible, has contradictory details. All I wish for you, is a continued healing of your relationship/marriage. Despite my own realities, it saddens me deeply when couples have to split. Continue to follow your spirit guide. If it's in HIS plan,then everything will work for the good.
Friday, September 5th 2008 at 5:59PM
Marta Fernandez
Michelle we have much in common. My book, How to GET to the PALACE From YOUR PRISON deals with submission in marriage, but it also deals with how women can and have asserted themselves from a Biblical perspective in the past and how they can do so now. One of the problems is that most male (and some female) preachers skip over these scriptures and harp on Ephesians 5. God is not a respecter of person and he has not made women to be doormats. His Word teaches us how to submit AND when and how to assert outselves. I see now why I have gone through the trials, tribulations and almost the divorce of a good man for such a time as this. You keep pulling it out of me- I am working on a national women's empowerment tour.
Saturday, September 6th 2008 at 8:49AM
C. Joyce Farrar-Rosemon
