What to Do When Your Spouse Isn’t Pulling Their Weight in the Relationship (1838 hits)
A happy and healthy relationship is all about balance and compromise. It is about two people coming together in love – two equals choosing to share their lives together. At times, a healthy relationship requires sacrifice but when one partner is consistently giving more than the other, it can lead to tension and strife. Keep reading to receive some tips for what to do if you feel like your spouse or partner isn’t pulling their weight in the relationship.
Signs of an Uneven Relationship
All relationships have their highs and lows and it is common for one partner to feel like they are doing more than the other at certain times. But how do you know that you aren’t just blowing a small problem out of proportion or inventing a problem where there is none? Here are three signs that your partner isn’t pulling their weight:
1. They frequently forget things or break promises. It can be as simple as forgetting to pick up your prescription at the drug store or scheduling a night out when friends after you’d planned to spend the evening together.
2. They are apathetic about things that matter to you. Especially when it comes to things that can benefit your relationship, apathy is not something you want in a partner. If they don’t care about spending time together or they don’t make an effort to support you, it’s not a good sign.
3. They don’t acknowledge or meet your needs in the bedroom. s*x and intimacy are very important in a relationship but satisfaction in this area doesn’t always come easily – sometimes you need to have a conversation. If you’ve shared your concerns but feel like your partner still isn’t making the effort, you may be right to worry.
If your partner consistently exhibits one or more of the behaviors described above, it is a good indication that they aren’t pulling their weight in the relationship. But what can you do about it? Keep reading to find out.
How to Even the Playing Field
If you are concerned about your partner not pulling their weight, don’t just push your feelings aside – that can easily lead to resentment which is a surefire way to kill a relationship. The best thing you can do is to be direct with your partner. Try to have a conversation about your concerns without being accusatory. You may need to spend some time thinking about how you’re going to phrase things to ensure that the conversation is productive and that it doesn’t turn into a screaming match.
If your partner doesn’t respond well to your directness about your concerns, you may need to give them some time to think before you revisit the issue. Try to maintain perspective in the meantime and don’t fall into resentment. If a second attempt to talk about the issue fails, you might consider bringing in some outside help. If your partner vehemently refuses to engage in discussion about the relationship, it should be very telling to you.
Relationships are by no means easy – they aren’t supposed to be. But if you feel like you’re putting more work and value into the relationship than your partner, it may be time to have a serious discussion. If your partner denies that there is a problem or refuses to make a change, you’ll need to start thinking about what you want from the future of your relationship and whether it is something worth continuing.
