Is Making Love a Form of Celebration in Your Marriage? (400 hits)

BY: Jackie Bledsoe, Jr. - 5 Jul '13 | Marriage


Making love is a celebration for you and your spouse. Let me let that sink in a minute…leans back and looks up…places hand on chin… Yes, making love in marriage is the result of you and your spouse connecting, then celebrating your connection. So, if making love isn’t feeling like much of a celebration to you or your wife, then maybe you are missing a connection or two.

A few weeks ago my wife and I attended a weekend marriage retreat. Our relationship has been clicking on a much greater level since then. One huge takeaway for me was viewing s*x as a celebration.


That physical celebration will never happen the way it should without some other non-physical connections first.

Celebrations are fun. Celebrations are rewarding. Celebrations come after something has been accomplished. There is no closer, more intimate, way to connect with another human being than having s*x. What a great idea God had when He made us with the physical ability to celebrate like this! However, don’t get it twisted. That physical celebration will never happen the way it should without some other non-physical connections first. Many wives are probably shaking their head, yes, confirmation of that statement.

The speaker at the marriage conference said when a man and woman connect on three levels the physical celebration of s*x will naturally follow, naturally.

Fellas, if you make these three connections you will “celebrate” as much you can handle. In fact, you may have to take a break from celebrating. That is a great problem to have.

Are there marriages that have s*x even when they haven’t made the three connections? Yes. Are there marriages that have connected in one or two areas, but not the third, and still have regular s*x. I’m sure there are. But the s*x may not be the celebration both husband and wife are looking for. Maybe the husband is celebrating in the physical, but not the wife.

Here are the three connections you need to make to regularly celebrate with s*x in your marriage:

1) Connect EMOTIONALLY - s*x is more risky for a woman than a man. During s*x a woman is vulnerable and she is in a submissive position. Husbands, if you have not made an emotional connection, it becomes harder for your wife to be willing to celebrate. When your wife feels emotionally safe and secure, she is more likely to want to celebrate. Fellas, make your wife feel emotionally safe. Help her want to celebrate.

2) Connect INTELLECTUALLY - What makes your spouse tick? What are his/her likes and dislikes? Get in your spouse’s head. When you connect on this level, you will have more intimate conversations. You both will reveal more to one another. A level of transparency will come. You will even be able to talk about s*x. Fellas, you won’t be shooting (or feeling) “blindly” hoping you are in the right area. You’ll know because you both feel connected enough to discuss it.

3) Connect SPIRITUALLY - I don’t know where you are in your relationship with Christ. But I know my marriage would not have made it this far without Christ being #1 in our relationship. Connecting at this level is amazing. Prayer for and with your wife tears down any barriers. Try praying for your spouse when you are mad at him or her. The more you pray for them the more that anger goes away. Connecting spiritually tears down all barriers and makes it that much easier to celebrate.

Maybe your marriage and s*x life is all that you both hoped for. Would you agree that connecting on those levels has been a huge reason? Maybe your marriage and s*x life is suffering and nothing to celebrate. If so, work on connecting emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Then start poppin’ bottles because the celebration will soon follow.

BMWK – How can you better connect with your spouse emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually?

About the author

Jackie Bledsoe, Jr.
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http://jackiebledsoe.com

Jackie Bledsoe, Jr. writes a Family Leadership blog at jackiebledsoe.com, which helps men grow in their most important roles. The roles as husband and father. He is the creator of the series, "March DADness: Preparing Dads to Make a Championship Run in Fatherhood," and the author of the soon to be released eBook, "Lovers and Fighters: How to Love and Fight Your Way to a Better Marriage." Read more articles like this on his blog. You can also connect with him on Facebook and Twitter (@jbledsoejr).

Posted By: Yaiqab Saint
Sunday, July 7th 2013 at 11:20AM
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