My Son's Called African and I'm Upset; Why? (1472 hits)
A child's taunt reminds one parent how difficult it is to teach your kids about race.
The other day, when I was bringing my son to preschool, a classmate greeted him at the door by shouting, "You're African! You're from Africa!" My son and I were knocked back for a moment, but he quickly recovered (as only a 5-year-old could), once his teacher motioned for him to help with an art project. I, on the other hand, bumbled my way through a retort to the effect of "We're not from Africa; we're from America," and briefly considered whether to mention our 200 years of family history in Haiti and Greece.
For the record, my son was born in Boston and raised across the river in Cambridge, Mass., where he lives with my husband and me. He has never been to Africa, though he can identify the continent on a map. He does, however, have brown skin, as do I. It is also relevant to the story that the classmate who greeted him has a history of taunting her peers, including my son, for just about anything. Apparently, my son's brown skin was yet another opportunity for teasing.
When I discussed the incident with his teacher, she seemed skeptical that the comment was racial and, as such, distinct from any of the other taunts or rude behavior that are routinely addressed with trips to the "peace corner" and more playdates. True, there was no explicit reference to my son's race or even to his skin color. True, also, that there is nothing pejorative about being from Africa.
Setting aside for the moment the mocking tone in which the greeting was delivered, what is so troubling about being called African? Perhaps what needs to be interrogated is my reaction, not the comment itself.
But here is where context matters. It is not simply that my son is not from Africa but that he is a visibly black boy in an overwhelmingly white school environment. He and his classmates are alert to his color difference, even if most attribute no social significance to it.
The child who taunted my son clearly recognizes the social significance of skin color, seizing on this particular difference to undermine his sense of belonging. To be "African" in this context is to be set apart from the school community. Unlike taunts of being a "baby," this is one that our son is uniquely vulnerable to, and the classmate who delivered the taunt appreciates that. That is why the "peace corner" is an insufficient solution.
What is the solution? When I described the incident to a friend, she suggested that my son show his classmate "what this African arm can do" and smack her. She then remembered: My son is not from Africa. Reifying false differences is no more of a solution than is violence. Instead, as adults, we must begin by recognizing that children, even very young children, are color conscious. My son could sort light skin from dark skin by the age of 3, and I doubt that he is exceptional.
This appreciation of skin color predated, and exists entirely separately from, any understanding of race. Yet so often it seems that adults' discomfort with talking about the social concept of race leads them to ignore the concrete reality of skin color; we then disguise our fear as a principled defense of "colorblindness." Children are left to figure out for themselves what, if anything, skin color means.
Enter bullies to fill the void. We must give children the facts about skin color, emphasizing that pigment tells us much more about the amount of melanin in our skin than it does about who we are as a person. Instead of evasive and abstract talk about diversity, we should explicitly discuss skin color and put it in its place: an attribute that does not determine one's community.
Without that, dark-skinned children and their sympathetic light-skinned peers are intellectually defenseless in the face of divisive taunts. When a Cambridge-bred boy is teased for being African, he and his peers should be able to laugh at the absurdity of the remark. It is when they cannot recognize this absurdity that "African" becomes a dirty word.
Claudine Gay is a professor of African and African-American studies and government at Harvard.
Comments from the Root's members >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> from ldjah Biggest disappointment at reading this story was the end, finding out the mother is a professor. Of African and African American studies. Government, too. At Harvard. If we can't count on the supposedly "best and brightest" and situated among to instill first--let alone raise--consciousness in our youth. Has she not nurtured her son that he is indeed African, of Africa, that Africa is in him, and that no one can insult him by the call of "African!" Young African, let your back be straight, your spirit be warmed and your smile welcome the recognition of the ancestors at the mere sight of you. A key principle of the "African American" holiday, Kwanzaa is Self-Definition (kujichagulia); the other child may have meant or wanted to insult and stigmatize, but he is and will always be powerless to do so if you are constructed purposely, consciously, positively of who and what you are and why it uplifts you. I say to you as I have said to my own son. Be Great.
Yesterday, 6:26:51 PM–
from Erinn Anova I think that was a lost teachable moment. A great response for your son's benefit, (and the other child's) would have been: "Yes, sweetheart, he is from Africa, and so are you. Have you heard of the oldest fossil in the world, the bones of an African woman named Lucy? We're all related because of her.
Yesterday, 5:54:28 PM–
from mynd1 Just goes to show how co-opted the black voice is in academia and the media. The fact that someone would even write an article like this is absurd, but the fact that she is a professor of African American studies makes it an insidious. Some things cannot be excused and this is a perfect example of it. But of course that is why these so called "black" sites are not really owned and controlled by blacks and hence push this garbage.
Yesterday, 8:31:47 PM–
from JenFad I understand the point at which this mother is coming from and it's strictly as a "Mother Bear who wants to protect her cub" from racism thus hurt. That's what being a mother is about... wanting to protect and shield our children. I think the comments about the child being mixed or that the mother is married to a nonBlack man are really irrelevant. Besides she has already stated that she has Haitian and Grecian ancestry; Being born in America is just a plus which shows the great diversity of this country and the people who are in it. I'm sure she understands that racism exists especially being a Professor in a predominantly White Institution such as Harvard and it only makes sense that she's sensitve to the racial makeup of children in the class since she mentioned that her child was the only Black child in the class. There isn't one of us who have children that don't look for that stuff, too. It's about protecting the cub and making sure our cubs are comfortable.
Yesterday, 8:48:55 PM–
from Vicky Rogers Burks The mother look like she is straight out of Africa,and as you see her son looks like he's mix with white,the whiteman don't have to RAPE us anymore because we hate ourselves so much that we FLOCK to them.Don't no body want to be BLACK anymore.WHY? WE need to stop this dumb s_ _ _,and get back to LOVING ourselves.That's why we are still at a stand still,wake up BLACK PEOPLE! PLEASE???? J.K.I.R.@
Yesterday, 4:54:54 PM–
Dee Dee Russell @Vicky are you serious??? Only person raping black women in 2011 are black men and what the hell do you have to say about all the black men dating white women and furthermore, the scant few black men that are m marrying, 22% of them are marrying outside of the race. Go scold some black men!! Sick of this fcukery!! BW are their worse enemy and look at your profile of a very light skin person. STOP the sickness!
