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Felicia, I applaud you. You should consider teaching parenting skills, mothers today need the lessons you have to teach.
Too busy? I think too afraid, too powerless. I think many parents are just too overwhelmed and under supported. Often the available tools are closely attached to the threat of some outside force managing your relationship with your kids and parents shy away from needed help.
Also, we seem to have lost our tribal nature, our concept of villiage. There was a time when everybody in the neighborhood would have checked those young men; now most of us look the other way. Fear factor again. We're afraid of our children and we're afraid of their parents.
I understand why you chose not to intervene, but could you have made a difference if you had? Couldn't we all? It still takes a village to take a child. The little bit of love we stop to give could save a life, and the life we save may ultimately be our own.
You had to be a fly on the wall yesterday, we had the exact same conversation. Having to pick our own switch from the tree and going back to get another because it was not satisfactory. That alone was mental punishment. Getting beat all the way down the street by everyone in the neighborhood until your parents really got you. I had a friend of mine tell me "There is more to life than Church" and she may be right but I just told her "Not in my life". Parents need to take back control, in some cases when the police are called and show up to the house they allow the parents to do their jobs and instruct the child to not call again. I agree Elaine no foundation of home. Kids can get birth control as young as 12, have babies at 15 or younger, quit school at 16, join the military at 17 are considered adults at 18 but when they decide to straighten up and want to go to college the parents are responsible until 23. Go figure.
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I always say to my nephews, your my problem now because you will not be the court systems problem later. The social service system have to see the problem they have caused but now have no way to fix it. There is clearly a difference between discipline and abuse.