How Not to Network (1103 hits)

I had a very interesting interaction today. As a result of some of my recent speaking engagements, I had a young man view my profile and call to ask for time to meet for coffee. He left the following message:

“Hi, this is XXX. I’m calling because I saw your profile on the XXX site and I want to talk with you. I’m starting a new business and I’ve put a team together, preparing to get my LLC. Just wanted to talk to you and find out if you can tell me what steps I need to take to start my business of right. I’d like to see if we can meet for coffee for about an hour or so and you can just let me know if I’m doing the right things. Call me at XXXX.”

I’m typically clear on the target audience I work with, what business I offer, and other branding items. This was part of the reason I call the phone message interesting. In my business I work with mid-career corporate women as a career coach – yada, yada, yada. 95% of my business is done virtually and because I also work full-time and have small children, it is rare that I’ll set a face-to-face appointment unless it is with a paying client I’ve established a relationship with. My business is fee-based and my time is extremely valuable to me. I love sharing resources, but I’m not a business coach – I have instead invested in a number of experts in that field to help me grow my practice the right way.

I thought I’d share with you my personal interpretation of the message from the perspective of a business owner:

* I don’t really know what you do
* I don’t know who you work with, but you look like you can help me
* I want you to give me your personal time & share all your resources – free
* I don’t care about you. I just want what you have

Why is this important for you to know? Because we all have been the person leaving the voicemail at some point. Remember that when you are truly “networking”, you are connecting with people on a reciprocal level – one where you are seeking to understand the other person and establish mutual trust for an ongoing relationship. This cannot be achieved when the conversation is one-sided and it’s all about what you want. Here are some quick tips for making that initial contact:

1. Find out as much as you can about that person’s interests, what they offer, likes/dislikes, area of specialty (e.g. their website, online profile);
2. Think of what resources, referrals, and skills you might have that would complement what they do;
3. Respect the person’s time. Try starting out with, “I’d love to connect for just a few minutes to find out more about what you do”. You can ask questions to find out more about extending the discussion when you have that initial meeting and you can find out if there are fees involved

In case you’re wondering, I did return the call. I left a message that clarified my expertise, and I offered a “complimentary” 10-15 minute call to talk with the person & determine if there are any resources I could offer that would help him with his business start-up. Maybe he’ll call back or email, maybe he won’t.

Coaching questions for you – in what ways have you learned to really connect with someone who has a resource you want? What gifts, talents, or resources do you have to “barter with” in a networking situation? How will you best utilize this information next time you make a connection?

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Tanya Smith of the M.B.A. Woman helps mid-level corporate women create personal development plans that will bring greater enjoyment into their work and personal lives. To grab a free copy of her special report, “10 Business Behaviors that are Essential to Advancing Your Career,” visit http://www.mbawoman.com. Posted By:
Thursday, January 28th 2010 at 9:13PM
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