HOW ADULTS & CHILDREN WITH ATTENTION DEFICIT/HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER (ADHD) CAN HAVE A SUCCESSFUL NEW YEAR... (1778 hits)
For Immediate Release From CHADD_ADHD!
A Fresh Start For The New Year
Have you set your New Year’s resolution? You haven’t? Great; don’t bother setting one.
Forty-three percent of people who start the year with a resolution of some kind end up dropping or breaking it by the beginning of February. Of those who do drop it, thirty-five percent say they simply ran out of motivation to continue.
For some people, setting a New Year’s theme helps them to have a good start to their year. Another set of people choose a series of goals or one large goal to accomplish before the end of the year.
If that’s not your style and you have ADHD, what can help you mark the beginning of the year and not leave you feeling overwhelmed or unmotivated?
Every week is a new start
Adults and teens who have ADHD are great at seeing the “big picture” they’d like to achieve and can feel excited to get started. The newness of the challenge sets off brain chemicals that can make you feel energized and focused. After a little while, that newness fades aways and the rush of energy you had fades with it. Old habits kick back in and can leave you feeling discouraged.
Instead, pick a small habit to replace. Habits can’t be “broken,” says Lama Bazzi, MD, a psychiatrist in private practice in New York City. The trick is to replace the old habit with a new habit and a new or updated routine that goes along with that new habit.
“I need to consciously decide to replace the routine with another behavior from which I can derive similar satisfaction,” says Dr. Bazzi. Starting with small habits and small changes can later snowball to bigger changes—if that is your goal. She suggests you not be concerned with the big changes of a new year’s resolution, but instead use the beginning of your week as the start of one small new habit.
“With a Monday reset, you can set smaller, more reasonable goals and check in with yourself regarding your progress once weekly, instead of yearly with resolutions,” Dr. Bazzi says. “Small changes are the key to success.”
With the idea of a “Monday reset,” if you don’t achieve the small goal or slide a bit in forming the new habit, that’s alright. Starting again on the next Monday simply means you are practicing the new habit until you are ready to pick another new habit for another Monday.
Picking realistic habits and goals
Teens might look at the coming year and pick big, complex goals to achieve. Adults, too, overestimate the changes they want to make in setting their goals. ADHD challenges such as time management and organization can make it difficult to achieve those goals, especially when vaguely defined.
Since the idea is to make small changes, selecting simple goals that you have the tools to achieve now can help you begin. Pick one habit that leads toward your goal to help you start:
Rather than “have a spotless bedroom” a small habit can be “empty my trash can every night.” Rather than “work out more” a small habit can be “walk up one flight of stairs a day.” Rather than “spend less time on social media” a small habit can be “put my cellphone or tablet in a drawer (and out of sight) before dinner.” “Habits are a way for the brain to automate repeated patterns of behavior in order to ensure we use our awareness more efficiently throughout the day,” Dr. Bazzi says.
Once the first habit becomes automated, she says, pick a Monday to add one new small habit to go along with the first. Continue this pattern until you feel you’ve reached your goal—better bedroom keeping for the teen and more intentional social media use for the adult, as examples.
Take the pressure off the New Year
“It’s probably more useful to look at what’s going on in our lives—if it’s a really good time to make a change,” says Sophie Lazarus, PhD, a psychologist at the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center.
Not every new year needs resolutions, new habits, or goals, she says. Sometimes, it’s best to just enjoy the fresh start from the turning of the calendar page and leave it at that. There is no need to create situations where you can end up feeling discouraged or disappointed in yourself–especially for teens who may be struggling already in school or socially.
We’re halfway through January. Have you broken your New Year’s resolution yet?
You did? Good, it’s quite all right. Only about eight percent of people who make resolutions actually keep them. We can safely guess that the majority of people who deal with ADHD symptoms are not going to keep their New Year’s resolutions.
A new idea that may be a better fit is a New Year theme. Setting a theme allows you to project what you would like from your year and let in—or take out—the things that don’t support your theme. It’s goal-setting that meets your needs.
Why a theme?
New Year’s resolutions seldom work. Too often we set “big changes” for ourselves, and we don’t take into account the need for novelty, the difficulty of staying with a task once it gets boring, the forgetfulness and inattention that come along with ADHD, and the scheduling changes the resolution might bring to our routines. After a little bit of time, the resolution becomes too much and is left by the wayside.
“What makes a theme so special is that you don’t have to stick to it every day,” says Megan Poorman, a biomedical engineer. “You don’t have to check a box; you don’t have to guilt trip yourself. There is no task to fail at, no rubric to measure yourself by, and no waiting for next year to try again. Having a theme for the year is almost like setting a mantra. It serves as a guiding principle when making decisions and reflecting on events. Setting a theme removes the daily pressure of measuring yourself against something you wish you were and encourages a holistic approach to self-awareness.”
One common experience at the beginning of a new year is to evaluate what we are doing, where we are now, and where we hope someday to be in our lives. Some people advocate that you “find your passion,” and other voices say “develop your purpose.”
ADHD symptoms of inattention, impulsivity, and the need to chase novelty can help you find your passion or develop your purpose. Taming those symptoms, and working with them, can help you design a life you enjoy.
Passion or purpose?
“It’s universal to want to have a sense of meaning in our lives and feel as if we are making a valuable contribution,” says Laurie Dupar, a nurse practitioner and ADHD coach. “For people with ADHD, this is especially important, because what we are passionate about truly contains the answers to what will hold our attention and interest. When something holds our attention and interest, we are more likely to experience success and feel happier. The positive experience of success and happiness then spills over to positively influence other areas of our ADHD lives.”
Your passion is the endeavor in your life that seems to give you energy when you think about it or engage in it. It may be something that brings you joy or contentment. It can be a self-focused way of thinking, though many people have channeled their passions into activities that also help to better other people’s lives.
Your purpose is the goal that directs your life and helps to guide many of your decisions. It reminds you to stick with the gritty parts, because there is a reason for what you do. Often it is an other-focused way of thinking, though one can be passionate in pursuing a purpose, or purposes, in life.
En esta serie de videos en español, que hizo El Futuro con la colaboración de CHADD, escuchamos la voz de los verdaderos expertos. En este nuevo encuentro conversamos acerca de cómo sabemos si es TDAH. ¿Qué comportamientos solemos ver? https://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fc...
