When the truth sets you free, how eager you are to set your lover free! But, what is true to you may not be your lovers idea of truth.
Would you put their belief on blast and try to announce that what they believe in is keeping them chained to slavery, or do you try to pray their chains away?
There is nothing more humiliating to your spouse than being called out for doing wrong amongst the public. Even if your message is not meant for your spouse but meant to help your fellow neighbor; If you know your spouse is all about the thing you are saying is wrong, they will take offense.
Once you have blatantly offended your mate, they will start to see you as the enemy, a person who will try to tear down their credibility.
Just like the times you hear someone complain about their lover in public. Your wondering to yourself: "Aren't you the one who chose this person? You two don't seem to have much in common. Why don't you look in the mirror instead of point the finger at your other half?" Public defamation of your mate's character eventually makes both of you look bad and equally complain worthy.
Save your disagreements for your family or lovers meeting time. Set up a time to talk or write out your SWOT analysis of your relationship. S: Strengths W: Weaknesses O: Opportunities T: Threats Each week or every other week to once a month, communicate your SWOT analysis. To avoid yelling, write out your thoughts. Video tape your thoughts. Whatever form of communication that helps you avoid arguing is the path to choose.
Many couples fight because they think their viewpoint is right and the other persons is wrong. They want to feel validated and they want to hear that they were right.
Spare your mate humiliation and the feeling of being wrong or looked down upon. They may even feel like a sell out or traitor. Work on yourself, pray about the issues, then focus on your mates strengths.
But if you can't live with your mate if they continue doing what you deem as wrong, then it is time to leave them alone.
