Why are married men more attractive than other men? (2221 hits)
I am planning to marry my highschool best friend in August. I can admit that I am not innocent, I have done things that other women would say was sleazy, slutty, or just plan whorish. But I spoke to a very wise male friend of mine that told me that a married man gets more p*ssy throwed at him then a man who is not married just because this turns some women on. Okay wtf, really ladies this is a little much because I feel that what goes around comes around. If in fact one of these women decide to get married or are already ready married would it not make sense that somebody might be attracted to your husband just because he was married. Like I said I have not lead a innocent life , I have had relationships that was only for sex but he was not another womens' men, I think that if a women gon share a men with another women then you mine as well share a vibrator or any other sex toy( sorry so blunt), not to offend anybody but its' true , I like to be number one but thats' me all the number two women I guess will just continue to recieve seconds because if the man is married regardless of the fact that he is sleeping with you if he wanted you he would leave his wife no matter what his excuse is for staying with her. If there are any ladies out there actually sleeping with somebodys' husband just know if a man actually find you worthy of recieving a ring, you just may find that like you somebody sleeping with your husband, its' called karma
Posted By: Dawn Feagin
Thursday, December 1st 2011 at 10:20PM
Some women are "down with O.P.P."... (other people's property) simply because it takes no work to get or keep it... she doesn't own it...and doesn't have to do anything difficult to him... Of course there are those who fall foolishly for someone else's O.P.P. but hey many times women have there own reasons for dating married men which many times are multifactoral in nature ... Speaking of nature.. do you recall an old Rap song (O.P.P.) by this Group Naughty By Nature?
OPP, how can I explain it...
I'll take you frame by frame it
To have y'all jumpin' shall we singin' it
O is for Other, P is for People scratchin' temple
The last P...well...that's not that simple
It's sorta like another way to call a cat a kitten
It's five little letters that are missin' here
You get on occassion at the other party
As a game 'n it seems I gotta start to explainin'
Bust it .....
Have you ever known a brother who have another like ah girl or wife
And you just had to stop and just 'cos he look just as nice
You looked at him, he looked at you and you knew right away
That he had someone but he was gonna be yours anyway
You couldn't be seen with him and honestly you didn't care
'Cos in a room behind a door no one but y'all are there
When y'all are finish, y'all can leave and only y'all would know
And then y'all could throw the skeleton bones right in the closet do'
Now don't be shocked 'cos if you're down I want your hands up high
Say OPP (OPP) I like to say with pride
Now when you do it, do it well and make sure that it counts
You're now down with a discount
You down with OPP (Yeah you know me) 3X
Who's down with OPP (Every last lady)
You down with OPP (Yeah you know me) 3X
Who's down with OPP (All the ladies)
I however was never down with O.P.P. but it seems that women were always trying to take my property for themselves for a night or two. ((Lol)) I've dated some not so good looking men and when I started dated them... all of sudden it's like they became a magnet for women!! Go figure.
okay guess I did, I know you gon give me feedback looking forward to your thoughts thanks jen
Sunday, December 11th 2011 at 2:01PM
I find that women who are attracted to married men are attracted for one of three obvious reasons:
a.) It gives the mistress a sense of power, a "high", by stealing someone else's man. When it goes out of control it turns into a psychological disorder.
b.) the mistress suffers from low self esteem and she is afraid of being alone, or
c.) the mistress has the freedom to come and go as she pleases without facing all the domestic duties of a wife (have to put up with the laundry, cooking dinner, dirty dishes, etc, etc.) It is like a "friends with benefits" situation, except that often in a "friends with benefits" situation one or the other wants to go from "Being F*ck Buddies" to a being in a commited relationship.
What these women don't realize is that they simply lack the morals mainly because they are willing to get in between a marriage and possibly destroy it. After all, misery loves company...
And you know what I find hilarious? Is that MOST men will get down with the get down...and guess who's the target of the wife's anger? Sholl ain't him! She'll *forgive* his transgressions but that WHORE???? Rotflol....when in fact HE was the one who made the marital commitment to keep only unto HER so her rage should be directed at him and also, if there is one...there is another and if she's found out about THIS one, trust and believe...there were others before that one! So, what the Mrs, has is a philandering husband whose character she either played blind to, hoping/thinking/wishing being married to HER would change or she was just ignorant of his whorish ways. Either way it goes..it would be an AUTOMATIC death sentence to a marriage involving me! Not sharing no dick, Not now, not tomorrow, next week, next year...or EVER!!! I'd rather be single and free than held in mental captivity by husbandry lust. But, that's just me.
Tuesday, December 13th 2011 at 6:15PM
I'm confused@Dawn when you say you were all those *things*...but none of your exploits involved a married man. So, what (in your mind) made you all that?
Tuesday, December 13th 2011 at 6:18PM
Oh...almost forgot to ask! Does your *intended* know about your (past)? If not, do you intend to tell him and share with him those things you did? If you haven't...and you're leaning toward telling him..I'd strongly..very strongly...advise you NOT to! Whatever you did and whomever you did it with and for whatever your reasons were for doing them BACK THEN...keep it to yourself and carry it to your grave!! Tell it..and it will be the beginning of the end..before your marriage to your (best friend) ever gets off the ground!
Tuesday, December 13th 2011 at 6:22PM
[...And you know what I find hilarious? Is that MOST men will get down with the get down...and guess who's the target of the wife's anger? Sholl ain't him! ...]
That's not hilarious but rather pathetic in my opinion. Any reasonable thinking person would be upset with the spouse or significcant other, but rather opposite ends up happening, eh. When emotions are running high, the brain deosn't think properly. People who have cheating spouses take out their anger on the ther person because they see them as a tramp or homewrecker keeping their man from totally being committed in the r/ship. It's always the other woman's fault for sleeping with someone's man. Didn't you know. Who knows whether the other person knew whether or not the man was in a relationship. Cheaters also lie and deceive not only their spouses/significant others... but the person they creep with most times.
In the case of the O.P.P. that's just like a modern day version of Mrs. Jones' song... I've never really understood why a person wanted to be with someone else's property. That's just me.
@ siebra you are so right my first husband was a butt chasing dog, lmao, my grandma always said' long as he take care of home" I stood by that for about eight long years until I decided that him taking care of home was not enough, I packed the kids, my bags, and relocated to this day he begs to remarry( yeah right) anyhow I always told him I would rather be the mistress because she could just f*ck him and send him home to me so i could, care for him, dress him, be his personal assistant, and the funny thing was the entire eight years i never cheated, never even pay another man any attention, I can remember for the longest time feeling uglly and unattractive it was not until i was with another man that i even felt sexy, mom should have told me beware of dogs
Wednesday, December 14th 2011 at 11:02AM
@ Denise jones, yes I have told him about my past, I stand by being totally honest. My mother is old fashion in the sense that she feels like a woman's cookies are just for her man. I was raised to act like a lady and not to engage in sex of any kind until marriage. Of course I did not listen(lol). I married my husband at nineteen at the time he was thirty-four, he was retired from the marines and he was a change from the pants sagging dope boys I was used to seeing in my neigborhood. eight years later, I had left him and moved back home, I was really depressed I had done everything I felt a wife should and I felt betrayed. I ran into a guy from school who had knew of my husband and we talked about the marriage and my feelings, he later invited me to attend a show he was performing at a hall in town. To be truthful, he was adorable, I had not been touched by a man in two years and I felt the need to have sex, I am not shy so I suggested it and he took me back to his house , we ordered food and I cant tell you what time he stopped but some time I woke up in the morning to find flowers and breakfast. This was life-changing for me I think what really did it was when he suggested to keep the lights on. after my marriage fell i feel unattractive so this surprised me, he prasied my body, he whispered in my ear telling me I was beautiful, I walked out his door a different woman, so when I said i have done things morally, I give my body to my man, he was not married but we were not together, I am grateful however because I was lost, depressed, and after that experience I felt better about myself. Sadly I had to admit this to my current love because they turned out to be friends and it was uncomfortable because he would come around and say little things to me, so we all agreeded that their friendship would be outside of our home because my current love was not feeling the fact that we had did that in our past . Anyhow, I have postponed my wedding it's in the air, I dont want to go through divorce again and I feel as if once again i have been chosen , I just want to make sure that it is right and that he can be the man I need him to be because i am a hellava woman so i need superman lol. I will keep you ladies updated on the wedding thanks for all the comments, you guys are wonderful!!!! xoxox
@ jen the crazy thing about my husband was when we had sex it was not oral or dirty talk involved it was basic nothing passionate, but upon speaking to his woman he chose to engage with sexually it turns out he talked dirty and the whole nine wow, really pissed me off but I guess it was one type of sex for the wife and another type of sex for the mistress, too this day we are friends I just dont bring her near my man, wtf!!!!
Wednesday, December 14th 2011 at 11:39AM
Or should I say How "DawnStella Got Her Groove Back, eh? Girl ain't nothing wrong with a woman feeling beautiful... not at all! ((Lol)) I believe that we need to make sure we keep our heads up at all time as women because there are so many things that can bring us down if we allow it. Just curious... did I read that you're FRIENDS with the ex mistress of your exhusband?! Please tell me it ain't so! HOw is that workding out?
Wednesday, December 14th 2011 at 6:27PM
@ jen lmao yes I am good friends with two of the other women, To be truthful they both were very supportive during the divorced, but he dogg walked them both in the end, one even went to prison for a year. I wont bring nothing I like around them , I think the friendship was easy because these women were always around, the kids sleeping over, just never knew that my husband was sleeping over, I am closer to one more than the other because she told me everything "Jerry Springer". A lesson I never want to learn again it breaks you and it takes a lot to pick your head up and keep moving
Thursday, December 15th 2011 at 1:39PM
@ Jen I have known these women for years, one was a church member , they were in the choir and it came a point in time were her car broke down and he was transporting her. The other girl dated and slept with my order brother, so I knew her from that. The kids would stay at the house wwith my kids, I guees I babysit while they f*cked my husband. I never thought he was cheating , never thought the women were sleeping with my husband, I did not realize that these things not only happened on "Jerry Springer" but also in real life. So strange I always was pretty much covered up, no short skirts or shorts no knee shots. When I left him the first time I put on a short skirt I cried I was so uncomfortable. I can remember crying so many times in church asking that god just release me from the prison of my marriage. I went in a young lady and came out a grown women, now I know what I want and need I dont settle and wont settle, at times I fear I need to put my guard down.
Thursday, December 15th 2011 at 2:17PM
Dawn, congratulations and I wish you well and truly hope things work out for you. I find your honesty refreshing and commendable. As to why women are attracted to married men, some find their ability to be stable very attractive. Some don't want them to leave their wives as they prefer to be the other woman, but be "taken care of." A girl I knew from high school was a kept woman for over 20 years. She never had a job and this man paid for everything.
Other women hope this perceived stability will translate into them leaving their spouse and coming to them and being "stable." We all know how this scenario usually plays out. These same women have the nerve to be angry when the man starts to cheat on her, and/or ignores his new family responsibilities. Ladies For the record-A REALLY STABLE MAN WILL NOT CHEAT ON HIS WIFE! Not saying good men never get divorced. Sometimes that happens, but a truly honorable man will wait till the papers are final before he steps back into the dating pool. FYI-If he says to you, "Were separated." It means HE IS STILL MARRIED. Don't get it twisted!
Thursday, December 15th 2011 at 3:24PM
Oh, I forgot this one. A friend of mine once told me she believed married men were safe because they only had one partner so they could have unprotected sex and she didn't have to worry about diseases-she being "the only other woman he had sex with other than his wife." I was like, you are both dumb asses. First-he assumed you we clean, and you stupidly believed you were the only one. Plus, do you even care about what might happen to his children if you give him Aids or something. But of course, she did not think it was possible that she could get Aids, since he was the only person she was sleeping with. To which I responded-what if he's already given it to you? Dumb!
Thursday, December 15th 2011 at 3:34PM
I used to be under that very same guise and vow of complete and open book *honesty.* what I've found and learned, not only in my own personal relationships but from others, trust must me earned, not freely given, simply because you are in a relationship and not everything is or should be shared and some things need to be kept to yourself..or find yourself having it either used against you, used as an excuse, thrown back in your face...or used to hurt you when they no longer want or need you. If you feel the need to get it off your chest, see a shrink, talk to your pastor or just let it ride with God...for no matter what...he'll NEVER EVER betray your trust in him; man will. Been there, done that and ain't NEVER going back! I remember me and another girlfriend tried to talk another girlfriend out of *coming clean* with a dude who would do ANYTHING for her NO MATTER WHAT! She'd been using him for years while actually being in a relationship with a dude who was dogging the mess out of her. Well, she decided she wanted to dump the *zero* and start a serious relationship with the *hero.* So...against all and better advice...she told him everything...and I do mean...E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G! Well, when I tell you from then on out...he started to DOG her and treat her like sh....and would barely lift a finger to help her or do anything for her like he once did...I tell you no lie. It was amazing his *turn around* in attitude and behavior that her sh..suddenly stank and she wasn't even worth the dirt and grime beneath the soles of his feet. Also, with you feeling this need to share...all about stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with him and happened before you met him...do you really think he's been as forth coming, upfront and truthful? I know plenty of married men who still do for their ex's behind their wives back and right up under her nose...and their wives have absolutely NO idea! But do what you must, it's just not something I would endorse...to anybody.
Thursday, December 15th 2011 at 8:19PM
sorry guys. didn't mean to post so many times. My computer was acting really funky that day and I kept hitting submit thinking it wasn't going through. Boy was I wrong. LOL
Friday, December 16th 2011 at 2:49PM
Women getting mad at the other woman...
P.S--I didn't mean it was falling down laughing hilarious. I meant it was *ironically* funny...
Saturday, December 17th 2011 at 10:12PM
Marylin Monroe said that all husbands make the best lovers, but not to their wives. LOL
Monday, December 19th 2011 at 2:00PM
@ Lena wow a kept woman!!! man are unbeliveable wow, thank you for the encouragement I have come a long way and I learn something different about myself everyday. The most valuable part so far has been the abilty to believe in myself and love me inside and out. I dont have settle in my vocabularly anymore that fact along has brung me a sense of peace that I can not begin to describe. I refuse to drop down on the list either I am number one or I am nothing, no compromise. I draw my line there.
Tuesday, December 20th 2011 at 12:39AM
Most of us have done sleezy shit. You can't condemn yourself for your past. As long as you have mature and moved pass who you were, then you should be good.
Thursday, January 5th 2012 at 11:51AM